I seem to think that the world revolves around me. I give humility a bad name. Somehow, I stay tightly focused on how things affect me and mine. Only rarely do I detach enough to transcend the temporal.
You folks may not have had this experience, but I have to work to stay out of self-pity some days. I think it's easier to do if I just run from those things that are either sinful or questionable. It's too easy to proclaim that "I can handle it". Then I take that long fall from the heights of my own ego.I really don't handle temptation well. To stand and negotiate with it is stupid. Example: Television. Gluttony.
I have no hope beyond Jesus and my relationship with Him. I can skip prayer. Never quite make it to confession. Bypass a Rosary. Skip Mass. Leave Mass early. Not be able to remember the last time I read Scripture. Bad mouth a priest. Complain about a tradition. And somehow pretend I'm Holy.
Or I can kneel broken by the idea that God loves me. And I have no idea why He does.
It's a whole lot easier to talk about how you should humble yourselves than it is for me to actually humble myself. But I have little grounds to criticize you until I get things right with the almighty.
Friday, January 28, 2011
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